Bifidobacterium Longum is Even a Delicacy in Japan!

About a month before I came to Japan, I remember seeing a special on MSNBC or CNN about the dangers of bacteria and viruses in the workplace. It was this sobering special about how America thinks it is clean, but it is actually wadding through swamps of sickly germs. I think it aired around the time that Karl Rove was in hot water for allegedly leaking and blowing the cover of a CIA agent for political purposes (Side note: if true, now I know their meaning of patriotism). Of course, viruses and bacteria are much more dangerous and potentially harmful than a possibly corrupt and inept administration. Why else would the media air a one-hour special twice daily? Now that I think of it, CNBC or MSNN might have been attempting to be witty and satirical by implying a link between the Bush administration and America’s poor health and lack of sanitation. Now whose cover has been blown?

Alright, back to the story. So after watching the special, listening to the scientific experts, who were supplied by the Clorox company, and seeing them swab every inch of the office, I developed a sort of germ phobia. I felt there were sleeper cells of germs everywhere. I was certain that all bacteria and viruses must be eradicated so that I could live in freedom. America must close its porous borders and kill every last evildoer. I could feel that a “long, long war” on germs was ominously close. Was neither an end in sight, nor a cost of the Clorox cleaning products known? It didn’t matter because I felt that if I were able to get every American behind me, we could stand up and fight the sickness that has plagued our country once and for all. I mean every sickness is foreign, right? Just look: Asian flue, Avian bird flue (China), and German measles. So what did I do? I chickened out, and I moved to a foreign country. I figured killing all those germs would be too much work, and a safer and cleaner country would be more agreeable with my immune system. I think I see a paradox here.

My castles, however, were built of sand. Two weeks in Japan, I found out that some of those evil bacteria are actually good for you. You can’t stereotype all bacteria as being bad. The name of an especially good bacterium is bifidobacterium longum. I also found out what happens to your body when the good bacteria in the digestive system get low. I’ll save you all but one detail: it felt like the Indy 500 was taking place in my intestines. It was one of the most painful things I’ve felt in a while.

My first two weeks were ecstacy, but now I was trembling and sweating violently and on the edge of calling for an ambulance. I finally passed out from exhaustion. In the morning, my supervisor took me to a doctor who spoke a little English. This was the first and only homesickness I’ve had thus far. Of course, when I was in pain, suffering, and in fear that I had hepatitis or a huge parasite that resembled Godzilla living in my body, I just wanted to go home. More importantly, my prejudices began to manifest. When I was in the waiting room, for example, I began to doubt the doctor’s credentials, knowledge of western medicine, and ability to heal. I began to develop the what ifs: What if he tries to give me acupuncture, what if he gives me crushed-up tiger bones and chicken claws, what if he doesn’t even have credentials, what if he can’t save me?

To my fortune, I was completely wrong about his ability to heal. He poked me in the tummy a little, listened to my gurgles, and then he gave me nine packets of Lac-B, which is the good bacterium. Here is a good article about where we get the good bacteria from and what it does: <http://www.genomenewsnetwork.org/articles/10_02/bifido.shtml>.

What have I learned from the whole experience? First, I learned that I have come with an “I know best” mentality. Those who know me might say that is my personality coming through, and I will agree a little. This is a common attitude throughout the JET program though. Many people in the JET program sometimes doubt the credibility of the Japanese and think they can be untrustworthy. I think this is racist, but I must admit that I’ve felt this way. Now that I’ve identified those thoughts, I need to work through them somehow. The second thing I learned is that we have good bacteria helping us out. Dairy, which is nearly nonexistent and expensive here, is a good source of the bacteria. Yet, one can find it in many Japanese side dishes, such as pickled cucumber, umeboshi (pickled plum), and all the other little things I hadn’t been eating. The third thing that I learned is how to say, “I’m sick” in Japanese. Finally, I learned that you can't win a war on germs. While some might be bad and potentially harmful, others are wholesome. I can protect myself, but if I go to far, I'll end up making myself sick.